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How to stop being controlling girlfriend

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We feel qualified to instruct our husbands on how to vacuum the carpet, talk to the children, and negotiate with his colleagues. All the while we tell ourselves that we are simply helping. For years I truly believed if I could just get my husband to be tidier, more romantic, and more considerate everything would be fine. I thought I was just being helpful, acknowledging how I felt, and being honest. Little did I know I was shooting holes in the bucket of our intimacy and romance. On the road to learning how to stop being controlling, I tried to make modifications, tried to be more subtle and even thought I was improving at times.


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10 Signs of a Controlling Girlfriend

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We like to have some control of our lives, and at times, this obsession to control the circumstances in our lives end up turning us into control freaks. And at the same time, your partner can never control you unless you give them that control voluntarily. It may be your friends, your work or just about anything else.

Voicing displeasure over it and talking about it is called communication. Controlling behavior in a relationship always has a small start somewhere. And soon, the need to control can turn into an obsession. Instead, calmly ask your partner for an explanation.

By reasoning with your partner, you can understand your partner better. Stay calm no matter what. Your partner may try to control you, but that happens only if you give them the opportunity.

Their behavior may have taken years to develop and overpower them. Use these tips one step at a time and let your partner see your side of the story along every step of the way. One of the easiest ways to start controlling a partner is by asking them for small favors that are never returned. Favors are mutual and should never be one sided. If your partner expects you to do something for them, they should be prepared to do the same for you.

Learn to be more confident about yourself and your ideas. This may sound devious, but at times, it takes looking into the mirror to understand how someone else feels. Look for ways to control your partner for a change. After all, even the most controlling of partners do have their weak sides. Start in a small way, and let your partner see this new behavior.

At times, a man has to be held by the hand and taught to behave like an ideal husband or boyfriend. Men want respect, women want love. At the same time, if you treat him with respect and help him feel loved, he may start to lose his controlling streak.

Build communication in the relationship and help your partner feel more secure. Express your displeasure when he tries to control you, in a clear manner without getting angry or retaliating aggressively.

Spend time with your own friends or family, and have a few close friends with whom you can share your secrets and opinions. So use these 16 steps to handle controlling behavior in a relationship, and with a bit of time and effort, your partner may just change for the better. Liked what you just read? E-mail to:. Your Name:. Your Email:.

Personalized Message:. Find out how to handle controlling behavior in a relationship using these 16 ways. I am hurt and feel betrayed by you. I have lost the last little respect I have for u.

You need help and I not saying that to be a bitch but you need to understand what it is your feeling, doing and why your reaction to these things are wrong.

You flip things and try to make it my fault that u had to act like that but it is lots of insecurities on your behalf that u want to feel like a man so u treat me like shit. If my answer is not to your liking that gives you all the more reason to be acting like this. You do have some self control right?

Or else u would be hitting me but you only do this so it will easier for you to ask for forgiveness. And not because your sorry for what you have done and you are even less sorry about what you said but you ask for forgiveness so I can move on and start acting right again. You want me to hid from people, be self conscience.

U want to bring me down and I hate it. When is it going to be enough? When will I walk away??? I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and 5 months. I have known for a long time that I have had a problem trusting people and it has ruined other friendships because of this. First off, I have never been cheated on. Third, I have had previous relationships where I have been treated badly, had my heart crushed and been let down; this has made my issue worse and has installed negative thoughts and behaviour even further.

I have been with my partner for a decent amount of time and I still find it hard to not have controlling thoughts and trust issues. At the beginning of our relationship, everything was fine; six months in and my insecurities came out. I would be paranoid about where he was, who he was with and how long he would be. There are also my beliefs which I throw onto him, such as clubbing for example; I believe people in a relationship should not go clubbing separately.

I know that this is controlling behaviour which I need to stop. The hardest thing is for me to not push my views and beliefs onto my partner. Sometimes it is hard for me to accept certain situations and I panic; then I get into an argument with my partner because I need to voice my opinion of this topic.

I have read all the above because I too am having some major control issues with my boyfriend. He shows signs all of which are detramental to our relationship. I do love him but….. I am in a Controlling Relationship. I was injurired on the job. He was retired. Recently, he went back to work. Before Christmas, he told me that I needed my own place. He claims that this will put fun, romance back into the relationship. But I truly feel that getting my own place will allow me to take a good long breath.

Maybe , no dating for awhile. We got our own place after 6 months of being with each other. We come from two different worlds. He is a veteran who suffers from PTSD and is overly controlling, insecure and feminist. He has his own business and doing good for him self so he always thinks he has the upper hand on everything. I trie to do the right thing by always cleaning doing laundry,cooking and taking care of things at home because I love him.

I take partial credit for him being this way. I know he needs help I keept thinking that I can help him. Can someone please give me some good advise?

I guess I am the one to blame since I was the one that allowed her to use me and get as much as she could from me. I was so blinded by her charms and believed in a controlling narcissist.

You see right there, I was believing in the best potential of her, but in the end she cheated on me and then denied the truth of the facts. She is a very bad woman, with an evil soul, and currently searching for the next victim. No one cares we are on here to talk about controlling relationships and people who are suffering with that Noone wants to hear u brag. I spent five years in a controlling relationship. I tried fixing it as best as I could, being an adolescent at the time I had nothing to compare it to and thought it was a problem with me.

I learned a few things from that relationship. First and foremost, you should never, ever be afraid of your partner. Hey Chloe, you are right.. Or else keep calm and keep acting cool all the time with out partner.. All such problems are very common in the relationship.. The six months as you said goes awesome..!! But after that.. We start feeling insecure.. And later unhappy because some one or the other starts taking relationship for granted n goes back to live again their previous lifestyle..

Because we girls when we fall in love with some guy.. We give our everything to them.. We stop all our bad habits for them.. Bring the permanent changes in us..

So who ever we date.. Its going to be the same story.. Great article, but would really love to hear your points for when this happens with woman and what to do. Everyone has issues on each side and its great when we can all talk about them fairly and not point the finger at men or woman and each person take responsibility for their own ish — would love to hear the other side to this story, would be very helpful for me.

How to stop being controlling

He has to be involved with his exwife cause they have three kids and then I suspected him of cheating on me. I go thru his whole phone, emails and texts and I get so livid and mad at him when he goes to hang out with his friend instead of stay home with me. Help, how do I stop being a controlling girlfriend??? She wants all his attention all the time.

Do you struggle with being too controlling? Then determine if you really need to make sure the course changes or if you can let whatever it is go differently than you were hoping.

Updated: July 3, Reader-Approved References. If you're worried that you're too controlling, then chances are that you expect every person and every event in your life to be a certain way. You may get frustrated when your significant other, friend, or co-workers don't act the way you want them to act, or when a meeting, a party, or a random Sunday afternoon doesn't go exactly as planned. If you have the urge to micromanage absolutely everything to make it exactly perfect and how you want it to be, then it's time to relax, take a step back, and accept that you can't control everything. Once you do that, you'll find that there's more satisfaction in giving up some control than in taking it.

11 Signs You’re A Controlling Person & It’s Sabotaging Your Relationships

All couples face problems in relationships. And one of the most annoying is total control. The more your partner controls you, the lower your self-esteem gets. One day, you can simply forget about those things that used to be a significant part of your life. The very thought of this will make you doubt if your partner loves you and your hobbies. In addition, controlling relationships are extremely difficult to end. If your girlfriend controls every aspect of your life, once you break up, you can face a devastating sense of lack of support. Because of this, many people return to their previous relationships, with all their shortcomings. But we should always remember that the meaning of any romantic relationship should be in happiness and harmony.

How to Handle Controlling Behavior in a Relationship

We like to have some control of our lives, and at times, this obsession to control the circumstances in our lives end up turning us into control freaks. And at the same time, your partner can never control you unless you give them that control voluntarily. It may be your friends, your work or just about anything else. Voicing displeasure over it and talking about it is called communication.

We all have our own particular way of doing things, but there's a fine line between being particular and being controlling.

Try these: time management relationship advice healthy lifestyle money wealth success leadership psychology. Learning how to stop being controlling is essential to maintaining not only your own sense of peace with life but also your professional and personal relationships. The guiding principles behind learning how to stop being controlling are twofold: you must learn to take control of your mind and to get your needs met in healthy and effective ways. Instead of letting your unexamined mindset run the show, letting go of control requires examining the limiting beliefs that are driving your behavior.

9 Ways To Stop Being A Controlling Girlfriend

Get expert help with your control issues. Click here to chat online to someone right now. Do you find yourself constantly trying to control what your partner does?

You can either click on the link to check it out or read over the signs below:. By being a controlling and possessive partner, you are taking away any freedom your partner had to be themselves in front of you. Remember all the reasons you fell in love with your partner. When you hear it like that, I highly doubt that is what you intended. Well, not completely okay, but the fact that you recognize it is the first step, and now is the time to change!

8 Ways to Avoid Being Too Controlling in Your Relationship

So he has had a long weekend and his best friend invites him to a football match and a bear later. Now you know this is his only best friend. Nonetheless, the controlling factor wakes up inside you and you get this strong urge to do all in your power and possibly beyond to make your guy stay home with you instead. What does he tell you? Stop being so controlling, what else. This is exactly the kind of behavior you need to get rid of. You should fight the wars without weapons, in case of relationships. Here are some basic traits you can adopt to become less controlling of a girlfriend and an open-minded, upbeat and more lovable one instead.

That's the first thing to do in order to control the urge of being a controlling partner. The day you start this, How do I stop being possessive over my girlfriend?4 answers.








Comments: 3
  1. Sazragore

    Thanks for the valuable information. It very much was useful to me.

  2. Arasho

    I consider, that you commit an error. Let's discuss.

  3. Tojajas

    I am final, I am sorry, I too would like to express the opinion.

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