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Why am i obsessed with finding a girlfriend

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Are you Obsessed with finding a girlfriend? This is not uncommon at all and many have faced the same problem. Including me when I was younger so I will share with you how I escaped this devastating paradox. But first, let me provide you with some more depth to the concept of being obsessed with finding a girlfriend. Why we as men want a girlfriend can be explained in several ways. First of all, we as humans live here on planet earth with only one biological purpose:.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How To Get Over a Crush That You're OBSESSED With


How to Stop Feeling Desperate When You’re Single

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Updated: August 17, Reader-Approved References. Obsession can kill a relationship. Ironically, this can mean that you lose the very relationship over which you obsess. Learn how to overcome this challenge and find real, authentic love. Explain to a close friend or family member that you have an obsession, since they will be able to provide you with support.

Try to spend more time with them so you can start doing things without your partner. Another way to get to grips with your obsession is to start some new activities, since it's crucial to have your own hobbies. New activities will also boost your confidence, which will help you be less dependent on other people.

For tips on how to avoid obsessing over your partner on social media, keep reading! Did this summary help you? Yes No.

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Article Edit. Learn why people trust wikiHow. To create this article, 24 people, some anonymous, worked to edit and improve it over time. Together, they cited 15 references. It also received 22 testimonials from readers, earning it our reader-approved status.

Learn more Explore this Article Understanding the Pitfalls of Obsession. Overcoming Obsession. Tips and Warnings. Related Articles. Article Summary. Part 1 of Be aware of the dangers of obsessing over another person. Obsession also prevents your personal growth and individuation. It isn't possible to get all that you need in life from another human being and trying to do so will smother the other person and will leave you feeling dependent and helpless.

These are all negative outcomes for both you and the person you're in the relationship with. Search for authentic love. You love a person because of who you are, not because of who they are. This person cannot fulfill the things that lack within you; only you can do that. Being in love is a choice, not something that is visited upon you as some sort of salvation. Love isn't an excuse or a distraction from the challenges you're facing in life. Love isn't a way to hide from the hard task of growing up, maturing and finding your own pathway in life.

Be aware that obsession can close your opportunities. While you are obsessing over one person, it is possible that you are failing to see the limitations of the relationship and its use-by date. Meanwhile, the person who would actually be more compatible with you might walk right on by while you're enslaved to an obsessive, one-sided relationship.

By not obsessing over any person in your life, you free yourself to know that the relationships you are in are right for you, and if not, to start extricating yourself and looking for healthier connections. Remember that timing is important and everyone is different. The person you're with may have priorities in his or her life that you just don't understand. Becoming obsessed and hoping like crazy that your mere existence will be enough to change these priorities reveals a lack of understanding and suggests that you're in need of a reality check.

People who change plans because of someone pushing them tend to end up really resenting that person. It may not show now but it will surface eventually, and it often happens when you're so deeply embedded that losing this person is like losing a part of yourself.

Relax more. If you think this is the right person for you, remind yourself that they may not be in the same stage of the relationship as you are. Relax and be yourself instead of trying to make things happen faster. Adjust your pace. Not everyone falls in love at the same rate and if you turn the heat down a little, you will feel better and they just may miss you enough to make a deeper commitment.

Part 2 of Admit to yourself that you have an obsession. That way, you can give yourself some space so you can work through it. Until you admit you have a problem, you will have a hard time overcoming it. Love yourself first and foremost. Self-love is about respecting your own dignity and supporting it, recognizing and nourishing your own talents and caring for your own needs and wants. Having a sense of purpose that matches who you are is handy too, although it may take some people longer than others to truly work out who they are.

In contrast, self-absorption is about placing your own needs and desires before anyone else's. Self-absorbed people may be desperate for others' approval and not have a great opinion about themselves. Warn people you care about if you're still working yourself out. The more confused about who you are, the more you owe it to other people to not obsess over them and to draw clear lines in any relationship about how you are still "finding yourself".

This is about telling the other person that you're still finding your way in life, that you sometimes feel confused and to let you know if you ever start trying to blur the boundaries by over-relying on the support, love and attention from this person instead of standing on your own two feet.

Honesty will help both of you steer through the challenges ahead with open eyes. Dedicate yourself to activities, pursuits and goals that match who you are. One of the signs of an obsessed partner is that he or she drops everything and only does what the partner does, only loves what the partner loves and only focuses on what the partner focuses on. Find a good balance between taking part in your partner's interests out of curiosity, love or simply being affable, while still maintaining the things you love to do in life.

Keep your usual hobbies and sports going. Ask your partner along sometime to see what you do but don't expect a "forever commitment" to your interests by your partner either. Start new interests as you continue to grow. Do not stifle your maturation because you fear that your partner won't like you changing or learning new things.

A partner who feels this way is unhealthy to be around; all human beings grow and change over time, this is to be expected. Your relationship is but one passion, not a complete replacement for the range of joys in life. Keep seeing your friends, family and community. While the first few giddy months of a new relationship often contain an element of complete immersion in one another, it isn't good for this to continue for a long time.

Make a dedicated effort to get back in touch with friends and family you've lost touch with, and get back into doing your community-spirited activities too. Even better, don't lose touch with anyone even at the beginning stages of the relationship; a good partner will see your commitment to others as part and parcel of who you are and respect it.

If you have a partner who demands that you don't see others and that you do nothing else but spend time together, be very wary. This is a sign of a controlling person who may well be manipulating you into obsessing about him or her and not letting anybody else into your lives. You may even end up convincing yourself that you made this choice, when you were actually manipulated into it.

Enjoy your relationship more. Obsession squeezes the fun out of a relationship and turns everything into hard work, causing you to worry about every word and action, to feel jealous about anything and anyone that removes your partner from you. Realize that a "one true love" is an ideal and it sets you up for obsession through wanting it to be so. If you both work out, it'll be because you've enjoyed one another's company, found it really easy to spend time together and have not fallen apart when apart.

If it doesn't work out, then no amount of obsessing would ever have glued back together an incompatible pairing. Make your social media exchanges pleasant and brief. Avoid hogging their time, wall or scrolling feed. In particular, do not leave snarky or snivelling remarks about their whereabouts, about people they're engaging with online or about your hurt feelings. Everything you type in and save is there for good and the more you obsess in the online environment, the faster it becomes clear to more than just your partner that you have a boundary problem that just isn't healthy.

Instead, give each other space online, keep the messages simple and sweet and leave the deep talk for face-to-face time. Do you really need to know what your partner is up to all the time? Avoid spending too much time on social media. Find distractions, such as reading a good book and walking in nature.

Avoid sitting around waiting for your partner to make your date happen. Consider your feelings when this person doesn't call, text or email you. If you're usually so crazy, angry or sad that you put off doing other things to wait and then end up making all sorts of excuses to explain this silence, it's probable that you're obsessed and that you're failing to get on with your life.

The reality is that, even if you are an incredible person, your partner is probably wrapped up in getting on with their own life. If they feel interested in you, they will take the initiative to contact you.

Will I Ever Find Love? 5 Questions To Ask Yourself If You’re Becoming Obsessed With Finding Love

One minute you feel on top of the world, and the next you feel totally pissed off and disenchanted with men as a whole. You find yourself instead. Love actually comes knocking. This is definitely true of love as well, and it seems like the harder you try, the more it avoids you. If you focus your energy into other things while keeping an open mind, prince charming will probably be knocking on your door in no time.

Article Summary:. They regained their freedom-- and so can YOU

A lot of the letters I get asking for advice are from people who worry they'll never find love. Yes, love is pretty wonderful. Yes, being with a committed partner can feel fantastic and safe and all those things in great movies and books. But it's definitely not the only thing in life worth living for -- hell, it doesn't even guarantee happiness, so why not focus on things one can control and enjoy being single until Cupid points his little arrow your way?

‘I Can’t Stop Obsessing About Finding Love!’

Readers interested in learning how mass murderers who act alone can be stopped are likely to be disappointed by this unpersuasive book. Turrettini, a Norwegian expat residing in the U. In Norwegian-born attorney Turrettini's dispiriting estimation, there are plenty of lone wolves out there, young men—almost always young men—so disconnected from the world that killing is the only Unni Turrettini. For the first time, the life and mind of Anders Behring Breivik, the most unexpected of mass murderers, is examined and set in the context of wider criminal psychology. Breivik murdered seventy-seven people, most of them teenagers and young adults, and wounded hundreds more. The massacre left the world in shock. Breivik is the archetypal "lone wolf killer," often overlooked until the moment they commit their crime. No other killer has murdered more people single-handedly in one day.

How To Find A Girlfriend You Actually Want To Date

A lot of guys just want to get a girlfriend, without really considering the type of girls they actually like. The key is to find a girl that you actually want to date, a girl that you actually enjoy spending time with. This is a lot harder to pull off than dating any girl you find hanging out at a bar. Just be sure to take your time.

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Updated: August 17, Reader-Approved References. Obsession can kill a relationship. Ironically, this can mean that you lose the very relationship over which you obsess.

Stop obsessing about finding love

I have always been a hopeless romantic, since before I can even remember. The mere thought of love, of falling in love and finding someone who loves you back, hits me in all the right places. It consumes me.

I've been single for quite a long time. I've had a relationship here and there, a few months come and gone, but nothing I'd actually gauge as meaningful. In fact, I think I've been truly single for about five years now. And I do find myself occasionally wondering, will I ever find love again? You know, real, head-over-heels, consistent, monogamous love.

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Dear Polly,. My last breakup was extremely hard on me. We were going to move in with each other post-graduation, but shortly before the move-in date, he ended the relationship. Dating in New York is absolute trash for everyone, but I feel like I exacerbate the generally shitty situation because I tend to get overly hopeful when I meet someone new despite my better judgment and then get frustrated with myself when things inevitably fall apart in a bad way. I have no idea where to start, though. Wants to Stop Caring. Dear Wants to Stop Caring,.

Finding a girlfriend isn't easy, but it's even more difficult finding one you However, it's not impossible to think that we could put ourselves in a position to be the.

If you buy something through a link on this page, we may earn a small commission. How this works. How do you continue to date in hopes of finding a serious relationship — without seeming desperate? The good news? Being single has tons of perks — hello, taking spontaneous road trips and being the boss of your own life.

To The Girls Who Are Obsessed With Finding Love







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